When a German sub attacked U.S.

July 17, 2018

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Do you Know me?

July 15, 2018

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’ She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’

She again replied, ‘Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.’

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

‘If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.

Thanks to Tony V for the above

DIY

July 14, 2018

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Thanks to Dennis V for the above link

 

What The Fluff

July 13, 2018

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Ain’t That a Kick in the Head?

July 9, 2018

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Baxter Black

July 4, 2018

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Thanks to Tony V for the above link

 

National Model A Convention in Branson

July 1, 2018

My co-pilot, Dave S, and I (below photo) drove over 20 hours in 95 degree heat without A/C to Branson, MO. We drove the backroads at 45 MPH (engine rebuilder’s recommended speed) and thus it took 10 hours each way.

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Below pics are some of the Model A vehicles that attended the Branson meet. 436 vehicles showed up.

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Our club which put on the first “Start Up” party the National Meet ever held.

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My 85 year old co-pilot checks out this pretty young girl’s model A tattoo on her ankle (sure, that is what he is checking out)

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“A road less traveled” in our cross country trek. Below road is actually part of the route my Garmin GPS laid out for us after Inter-state highways were filtered out.

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My 88 year old model A performed flawlessly down and back. What a gal!

 

Pope Francis

June 24, 2018

The 2018 movie about Pope Francis is excellent but you get a much better feel of the man by watching the below video of Mark Shriver being interviewed:

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The 3 Sons

June 23, 2018

A father told each of his 3 sons. As he sent them off to college, “I feel it’s my duty to provide you with the best possible education, and you do not owe me anything for that. However, I want you to appreciate it. As a token, please each put $1,000 into my coffin when I die.”

And so it happened. His sons became a doctor, a lawyer and a financial planner, each very successful financially. When their father’s time had come, and they saw their father in the coffin, they remembered his wish.

First, the doctor put 10 newly printed crisp $100 bills onto the chest of the deceased.

Then, the financial planner also put $1,000 there in 20 newly printed crisp $50 bills..

Finally, it was the heartbroken lawyer’s turn. He reached into his pocket, took out his checkbook, wrote a check for $3,000, put it into his father’s coffin, and took the $2,000 cash.

The lawyer is now running for Congress in your district .

Thanks to Tony V for the above

So That Is How It Works

June 19, 2018

I TOLD MY SON, “YOU WILL MARRY THE GIRL I CHOOSE.”

HE SAID, “NO.”

I TOLD HIM, “SHE IS BILL GATES’ DAUGHTER.”

HE SAID, “YES.”
I CALLED BILL GATES AND SAID, “I WANT YOUR DAUGHTER TO MARRY MY SON.”

BILL GATES SAID, “NO.”

I TOLD BILL GATES, “MY SON IS THE CEO OF THE WORLD BANK.”

BILL GATES SAID, “OK.”
I CALLED THE PRESIDENT OF WORLD BANK AND ASKED HIM TO MAKE MY SON THE CEO

HE SAID, “NO.”

I TOLD HIM, “MY SON IS BILL GATES’ SON-IN-LAW.”

HE SAID, “OK.”

AND THAT’S EXACTLY HOW POLITICS WORKS.

Thanks to Bert S for the above